RESOURCES
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TEENS
As a parent, you may find your teen is a little reluctant to come in for counseling. I've found that it can be helpful to suggest that you come in as a family, or to explain that you as a parent need some advice on how to improve your relationship.
The most important thing is that the teen feel cared about, rather than feeling like you're trying to "fix" them. If they feel you're trying to "straighten them out", they will most likely resist therapy. It's best to approach your teen casually, and with sincerity. Never demand or pressure teens into counseling - the old adage "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink" applies.
We can't even begin to comprehend the pressures and difficulties teens today face. Remember that no matter what they're communicating verbally, on the inside, your teen really would appreciate having someone to help them deal with their life struggles and challenges. The most important thing you can do for your children is get healthy yourself! Depressed or anxious teens benefit greatly from therapy, but studies show that kids of parents who are currently depressed or anxious do not benefit as much.
COUPLES
These are some very helpful marriage counseling resources for couples I suggest as "homework" between our therapy sessions.
I'm not an "affiliate" nor do I receive any compensation whatsoever from recommending these resources. These are solely for your benefit, and I hope they will be of assistance to you as we work together to make your marriage the absolute bestV be.
MARRIAGE BUILDERS
In the Marriage Builders site, you will be introduced to some of the best ways to overcome marital conflicts and some of the quickest ways to restore love.
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GOTTMAN INSTITUTE
The Gottman Institute applies leading-edge research on marriage in a practical, down-to-earth therapy and trains therapists committed to helping couples. No other approach to couples education and therapy has relied on such intensive, detailed, and long-term scientific study of why marriages succeed or fail.
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SEVEN PRINCIPLES FOR MAKING MARRIAGE WORK
John Gottman has revolutionized the study of marriage by using rigorous scientific procedures to observe the habits of married couples in unprecedented detail over many years. Here is the culmination of his life's work: the seven principles that guide couples on the path toward a harmonious and long-lasting relationship. Packed with practical questionnaires and exercises, The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work is the definitive guide for anyone who wants their relationship to attain its highest potential.
WHY MARRIAGES SUCCEED OR FAIL
Psychologist John Gottman has spent 20 years studying what makes a marriage last. Now you can use his tested methods to evaluate, strengthen, and maintain your own long-term relationship. This breakthrough book guides you through a series of self-tests designed to help you determine what kind of marriage you have, where your strengths and weaknesses are, and what specific actions you can take to help your marriage.
HIS NEEDS HER NEEDS
Marriage works only when each spouse takes the time to consider the other's needs and strives to meet them. In His Needs, Her Needs, Willard Harley identifies the ten most vital needs of men and women and shows husbands and wives how to satisfy those needs in their spouses. He provides guidance for becoming irresistible to your spouse and for loving more creatively and sensitively, thereby eliminating the problems that often lead to extramarital affairs.
LOVE BUSTERS
How spouses affect each other has a tremendous bearing on the success and failure of marriage. In Love Busters, Willard F. Harley, Jr., helps couples identify and overcome the most common habits that destroy the feeling of love. With his guidance, they will be able to avoid behavior that tears a marriage apart and focus instead on building their love for each other.
DEPRESSION
Depression is a treatable condition that is often helped with therapy. It can be a complex condition with no one solution. Sometimes the longer you wait to get help the more stubborn it is to leave.
Depression Homework:
Goldberg Depression Scale
You might reproduce this scale and use it on a weekly basis to track your moods. It's helpful to be able to discuss very specifically how your symptoms have changed from one session to the next.
What are some signs of depression?
- Loss of appetite
- Weight loss
- Early morning awakenings
- Lack of energy
- Too much sleeping
- Sadness
- Crying, especially without knowing why
- Suicidal thoughts
- Feelings of hopelessness
- Feelings of helplessness
- Lack of interest in things which were formerly interesting
- Lack of enjoyment of life
The presence of one or more of these symptoms does not necessarily indicate the presence of depression; but if several are present, you may be depressed.
ADHD
Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder
ADHD is primarily characterized by the co-existence of attentional problems and hyperactivity. It's the most commonly studied and diagnosed psychiatric disorder in children, affecting about 3 to 5% of children globally with symptoms starting before seven years of age.
There is no simple test for ADHD. There are check lists and symptoms which I can go through with you, and help you to look at the symptoms yourself.
It's important to see an experienced professional for a diagnosis, because PTSD (Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder), Bipolar disorder, and other anxiety disorders can have similar symptoms. If left untreated, the persistent and pervasive effects of ADHD symptoms can insidiously and severely interfere with one's ability to get the most out of education, fulfill one's potential in the workplace, establish and maintain interpersonal relationships, and maintain a generally positive sense of self.
